Saturday, February 14, 2009

Happy Valentine's Day

hope you got lots of nice chocolates and flowers etc. In Scotland when I was a kid it was the done thing to buy horrendous garish big valentine's cards for the girl (or girls) you fancied and deface every inch of the card and envelope with 'humorous' valentine's poems. There was a strict tradition that you could not diverge from for fear of putting the girl off you for ever. The card had to be anonymous but you could hint at your identity if you wanted. Some examples of the inventive rhymes employed:
Postie Postie
Do not tarry
Take this to
The one I'll marry

Postie Postie
Do your duty
Take this to
My blue eyed beauty

I wish I were a Rangers scarf
Hanging from your neck
And every time they scored a goal
What a hug I'd get

I love you, I love you, I love you almighty
I wish my pyjamas were next to your nightie
don't be mistaken, don't be misled
I mean on the washing line, not in the bed.

I know, I know... Valentine's Day is just an excuse for Hallmark and Nestle to sell more cards and chocolates... it's a capitalist holiday just like mother's day and father's day... who cares, it's a bit of fun...
Enough of that shit, here's some love songs for ya...

Cock Sparrer - We Love You


The Damned - Love Song


And one non-love song (for those anti-valentine's grinches)
PiL - This Is Not A Love Song

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